THE PICTURE GALLERY

by Joseph Addison and Richard Steele
(Originally published in THE SPECTATOR)

I was this morning walking in the gallery when Sir Roger enteredat the end opposite to me, and advancing towards me, said he wasglad to meet me among his relations the De Coverleys, and hoped Iliked the conversation of so much good company, who were assilent as myself. I knew he alluded to the pictures, and as heis a gentleman who does not a little value himself upon hisancient descent, I expected he would give me some account ofthem. We were now arrived at the upper-end of the gallery, whenthe Knight faced towards one of the pictures, and as we stoodbefore it he entered into the matter, after his blunt way ofsaying things, as they occur to his imagination, without regularintroduction, or care to preserve the appearance of chain ofthought.

"It is," said he, "worth while to consider the force of dress;and how the persons of one age differ from those of another,merely by that only. One may observe also, that the generalfashion of one age has been followed by one particular set ofpeople in another, and by them preserved from one generation toanother. Thus the vast jetting coat and small bonnet, which wasthe habit in Harry the seventh's time, is kept on in the yeomenof the guard; not without a good and politick view, because theylook a foot taller, and a foot and an half broader. Besides thatthe cap leaves the face expanded, and consequently more terrible,and fitter to stand at the entrances of palaces.

"This predecessor of ours, you see, is dressed after this manner,and his cheeks would be no larger than mine, were he in a hat asI am. He was the last man that won a prize in the tilt-yard(which is now a common street before Whitehall). You see thebroken lance that lies there by his right foot; he shiver'd thatlance of his adversary all to pieces; and bearing himself, lookyou, Sir, in this manner, at the same time he came within thetarget of the gentleman who rode against him, and taking him withincredible force before him on the pommel of his saddle, he inthat manner rid the turnament over, with an air that shewed hedid it rather to perform the rule of the lists, than expose hisenemy; however, it appeared he knew how to make use of a victory,and with a gentle trot he marched up to a gallery where theirmistress sat (for they were rivals) and let him down withlaudable courtesy and pardonable insolence. I don't know but itmight be exactly where the coffee-house is now.

"You are to know this my ancestor was not only of a militarygenius, but fit also for the arts of peace, for he played on thebass-viol as well as any gentleman at court; you see where hisviol hangs by his basket-hilt sword. The action at the tilt-yardyou may be sure won the fair lady, who was a maid of honour, andthe greatest beauty of her time; here she stands the nextpicture. You see, Sir, my great-great-great-grandmother has onthe new-fashion'd petticoat, except that the modern is gather'dat the waist; my grandmother appears as if she stood in a largedrum, whereas the ladies now walk as if they were in a go-cart.For all this lady was bred at court, she became an excellentcountry-wife, she brought ten children, and when I shew you thelibrary, you shall see in her own hand (allowing for thedifference of the language) the best receipt now in England bothfor an hasty-pudding and a white-pot.

"If you please to fall back a little, because 'tis necessary tolook at the three next pictures at one view; these are threesisters. She on the right hand, who is so very beautiful, died amaid; the next to her, still handsomer, had the same fate againsther will; this homely thing in the middle had both their portionsadded to her own, and was stolen by a neighbouring gentleman, aman of stratagem and resolution, for he poisoned three mastiffsto come at her, and knocked down two deer-stealers in carryingher off. Misfortunes happen in all families: the theft of thisromp and so much money, was no great matter to our estate. Butthe next heir that possessed it was this soft gentleman, whom yousee there: observe the small buttons, the little boots, thelaces, the slashes about his clothes, and above all the posturehe is drawn in (which to be sure was his own choosing); you see he sits with one hand on a desk writing and looking as it wereanother way, like an easy writer, or a sonneteer. He was one ofthose that had too much wit to know how to live in the world; hewas a man of no justice, but great good manners; he ruined everybody that had any thing to do with him, but never said a rudething in his life; the most indolent person in the world, hewould sign a deed that passed away half his estate with hisgloves on, but would not put on his hat before a lady if it wereto save his country. He is said to be the first that made loveby squeezing the hand. He left the estate with ten thousandpounds debt upon it; but, however, by all hands I have beeninformed that he was every way the finest gentleman in the world.That debt lay heavy on our house for one generation, but it wasretrieved by a gift from that honest man you see there, a citizenof our name, but nothing at all akin to us. I know Sir AndrewFreeport had said behind my back, that this man was descendedfrom one of the ten children of the maid of honour I shewed youabove; but it was never made out. We winked at the thing indeed,because money was wanting at that time."

Here I saw my friend a little embarrassed, and turned my face tothe next portraiture.

Sir Roger went on with his account of the gallery in thefollowing manner. "This man (pointing to him I looked at) I taketo be the honour of our house. Sir Humphrey de Coverley; he wasin his dealings as punctual as a tradesman and as generous as agentleman. He would have thought himself as much undone bybreaking his word, as if it were to be followed by bankruptcy.He served his country as knight of this shire to his dying day.He found it no easy matter to maintain an integrity in his wordsand actions, even in things that regarded the offices which wereincumbent upon him, in the care of his own affairs and relationsof life, and therefore dreaded (though he had great talents) togo into employments of state, where he must be exposed to thesnares of ambition. Innocence of life and great ability were thedistinguishing parts of his character; the latter, he had oftenobserved, had led to the destruction of the former, and usedfrequently to lament that great and good had not the samesignification. He was an excellent husbandman, but had resolvednot to exceed such a degree of wealth; all above it he bestowedin secret bounties many years after the sum he aimed at for hisown use was attained. Yet he did not slacken his industry, butto a decent old age spent the life and fortune which wassuperfluous to himself, in the service of his friends and neighbours."

Here we were called to dinner, and Sir Roger ended the discourseof this gentleman, by telling me, as we followed the servant,that this his ancestor was a brave man, and narrowly escapedbeing killed in the civil wars; "For," said he, "he was sent outof the field upon a private message, the day before the battle ofWorcester." The whim of narrowly escaping by having been within aday of danger, with other matters above mentioned, mixed withgood sense, left me at a loss whether I was more delighted withmy friend's wisdom or simplicity.